denial

All posts tagged denial

I often get asked by submissive (guys mostly) if I think they are doing a good job at pleasing their Mistress/Dominant partner. I honestly have to tell them, “I don’t know!” They will describe the things they do and they certainly seem pleasing to me. I even get asked for ideas on how to please their Mistress… that is the most difficult question because I am not their Dominant and everyone on this planet (and I assume on other planets lol) is different and what is pleasing to one person may not be pleasing to another – the most important thing here is communication. That’s what I’m talking about here, click to have a listen to my latest raw, unscripted Podcast.

As I said in my podcast here are a couple links to some posts I think would be helpful.

Praise & Reassurance

It’s the Little Things

A Little Tease Here, A Little Tease There

Tease Techniques

I’m sure there are other posts here, over the past almost 3 years that would be helpful. Feel free to use the search bar at the top right of the page and hopefully you can find something that will help you along on your journey. If not, send me a message and let’s chat! Thanks again for reading and listening and I look forward to hearing your thoughts so please feel free to comment!

Today, for some odd reason, out of no where I was having a bit of “drop.” I was feeling off and emotional and REALLY missing cagedmonkey while he was at work. I could feel my thoughts race, it felt like a roller coaster. I even caught myself wondering if I should just make him cum and forget this whole denial thing. I missed him so much today that my mind was racing through ways I could feel him… Making him cum is a huge way to feel him and connect with him. It’s been 173 days since he’s had an orgasm… He’s not quite half way there yet.

I don’t really want him to cum and I’m feeling much better this evening but this whole thing isn’t that easy on a wife who happens to be a keyholder to her one and only love. Who she happens to REALLY, REALLY like sex with! Haha I really am living how incredibly horny cagedmonkey is, how badly he wants to cum when he’s being teased and edged. I will say that I don’t feel there is much difference between how horny he gets at 3 or 4 months to how horny he is now… Just sayin’

It might be time to do some extended lock up. Perhaps some No look, No touch? What do you think?

As much as I would love to, I couldn’t possibly write about every time I tease cagedmonkey or every little thing we do. If I did I would have so many little micro posts on this blog haha. That’s one reason I like having Twitter, because we get to tweet out those sexy little tid bits!

So, I’m not going to get into the difficulties, again, about staying in someone else’s house and trying to be invisible so you don’t disrupt their life too much – I’m sure some of you get it. I do want to stress that, even in this situation, tease and a sense of control for both us, it’s still extremely important. We don’t have much opportunity but I try to find those little amounts that we do have and sneak in a tease here or there. Sometimes I send him up to play video games alone and keep the kids busy on a project just so I can do things like this – to remind him who’s in control. It also drives home the incredible horniness he has from being teased and denied for a almost 150 days!
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Ladies ask me all the time about how I keep him teased and what can they do so that their guy isn’t just locked up and forgotten about – because that’s the worst thing that could happen. Honestly, Ladies and gents, it’s the little things that keep it going and keep it fun. Just like it’s the little things in marriage, and we work everyday to keep that going… Having a guy in chastity or just controlling his orgasm without a cage is still work but it’s the fun kind of work! 🙂

I was talking to a friend about this stuff this morning too. He only wishes I had him locked in a cage, teased and denied for 150 days haha. But we talked about some of those little things and how they are needed to keep things going good! Even a quick grab of the cage and balls is a helpful reminder of who they belong to! 🙂
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Although I’m craving a good bondage and torture session (that’s for another post lol) these little reminders I give him help remind me that he is mine. He wears that cage for me, he submits to me because he is a strong man who loves me and trusts me. I feel like I am the lucky one to have such an amazing submissive man as my hubby who gives me his everything if, when and how I ask.

The other evening before bed, cagedmonkey and I snuck in a little play time. I stroked him and teased him and edged his cock. I love seeing that anguish on his face, that deep need for release as I stroke his cock closer and closer, only to stop and leave him unfulfilled.

I know he misses having an orgasm and I know he is extremely horny after over 4 months of denial. I felt so bad and awfully devious the other night that I decided to let him get himself good and hard and stroke his cock. I even let him stroke to an orgasm… Unfortunately, it wasn’t HIS orgasm he was stroking to. I allowed him to stroke his cock, while I looked right into his eyes and masturbated myself to an awesome orgasm.

I forced him to continue looking at me the whole time and he was not allowed to stop stroking until I was finished and satisfied. In other words, I came three times while I forced him to keeping stroking and watching me cum, over and over.

I know he slept well that night!

A few of you know but most, I’m sure, do not. We recently moved again and we will be living in the midwest soon. We are currently in between homes which means all of our stuff is in storage and we are staying with other people… for about a month or so. This also makes tease, denial, cock cages and other fun kinky stuff very hard to accomplish. It’s been a rough week or so and now I’ve started homeschooling both of the kids. Since we aren’t even staying in the area we will be living in, it was pointless to enroll the kids in school for a month.

I have been trying very hard to add in little teases and edges here or there where I can. I will try to make cagedmonkey’s mornings very rough and frustrating by stroking and edging his cock so he spends most of the day dripping precum. The other day he dripped so much it went through his underwear and shorts! We have no toys with us because they are all packed in storage. It does make things difficult when I have no cuffs or rope or anything to use to restrain cagedmonkey. That’s something I know he loves that I do. He really does love that helpless feeling! I miss making him feel that way, too.

We still have about 4 weeks to go until we have our own home again… I know we are strong enough to make it but that doesn’t mean it is or will be easy. We are working hard to keep the kink going with the limited time we have and the extreme lack of privacy – we don’t even have a door that closes. Right now our family of four (plus the cats) is living in and sharing two small rooms in someone else’s home.

Sometimes I feel like I’m letting cagedmonkey down. I know I’m doing my best to try and keep everyone happy and content to make it through these next few weeks.

This morning I got the urge to masturbate and decided I’d take the opportunity to tease the hell out of cagedmonkey while he was at work too! It’s so much fun when I’m feeling this way. I started out sending him pictures of my pussy, simply asking him:

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Hungry?

Then I sent him a couple others, including theses big beautiful things:

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As I was taking the pictures and posing my bits in a an appetizing way, I realized I was completely turning myself on. I felt myself liking how I looked and knowing that cagedmonkey would be extremely hard in his cage from looking at the pics. I got myself more and more turned on as I set my camera to selfie and just watched myself masturbate. I felt that warmth grow in my pussy and I knew I just had to cum! I had already packed my wand… But that didn’t stop me haha I found the bin that it was in and dug it out because I’d gotten myself so freaking horny that I needed it! So I sent him another picture to let him know I was so horny I HAD to get my wand out of the bin.

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I decided since I liked watching myself so much today and it was getting me so damn horny that I’d take a little video for him, so I sent him that. After I came nice and hard I sent him a good spread pussy picture showing the warm gooey wetness I wanted him to come and clean up.

I just know he’s going to have a wonderfully frustrated day today! 🙂

It’s now been over 3 months since cagedmonkey has been denied. I’ve had so much fun teasing him, edging him and using him for my pleasure. For the last month, maybe, I’ve gotten so much enjoyment out of edging him first thing in the morning. It used to be that it took him a bit to get going first thing in the morning and that was always the time we could have longer sex. It used to be that he couldn’t cum right away in the mornings… Well… I get him right to the edge and on the verge of a ruined orgasm almost every morning now… In a matter of a minute. Probably not even a full minute sometimes, seconds!

I seriously enjoy hearing the torment in his moans and the begging under his breath. It really turns me and I even get to the point of giggling. Sometimes I giggle so hard and even bust out laughing because I’m seriously loving how much I am controlling him. Right then in that moment, he is putty in my hands. I can make him what I want him to be. I love it so much!!!!

When I’m not using his cock and teasing and edging him, I leave him caged. That doesn’t mean I’m not teasing him at all while caged, I’m just doing it in a much different way. He usually ends up with a pretty big “rooty” after I’ve had time driving him crazy, taking his cage in my pussy and cumming all over it while he desperately wants to feel my pussy squeezing his cock and all he feels is the hard steel bars of his Jail Bird.

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Look how his big cock pushes so hard against that cage, pulling it away from his body, yanking on his horny aching balls! I’m smiling right now just thinking about it!

Cagedmonkey and I were talking this morning and I realized I was so, so happy and a bit turned on hearing about how horny he was. He was telling me about how my using him for sex last night and cumming so hard on him was frustrating for him. That it was driving him absolutely crazy to feel my pussy, only to be locked right back up afterwards. Feeling me one minute and then continuing to be teased and feeling the steel the next was driving him into a deeper hornier state. If you’ve read and know anything about me at all, it’s that I love being a cocktease. Knowing that he’s getting increasingly horny because of me is such a turn on for me.

I’ll admit, this morning, there was a bit of relief as he was telling me about the state of his horniness. After almost two and a half months of a year long orgasm denial stint there is a little worry that things will get stagnant, that they will just become the norm and that his horny wouldn’t continue to grow. So far, it seems that is not happening! We must be doing something right, changing things up just enough that we don’t get that feeling of it being normal.

I think it comes down to not being locked 24/7 and me using him when I want, yet keeping him locked when not in use. However, also taking the time to take him out and even if I’m not having sex with him, teasing him and edging him often and then again… locking him up. I think making him service me much more is also a huge boost in keeping the horny on the rise.

There is no way any of this would be fun or exciting if I left him locked up and denied for an entire year. It’s so much more fun and gets me going, knowing that what we are doing is actually increasing how horny he is.

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Cagedmonkey and I finally had a day together, alone in the house all day. Since mid January, our daughter has gone back to school full days which means there should be so much time during the day for play. It just so happens that this area we live in is very “snow day” happy. Every time we’ve had a day come up where cagedmonkey was going to be home some crazy weather anomaly would happen and they would cancel school. It was extremely nice to finally get a day to spend together doing whatever we wanted.

The very first thing I made him do was get the lotion and give me a leg and foot massage right after the kids left on the bus. It was so nice to sit back and get pampered by my subby hubby. Something as easy as a little leg rub felt so good and made me feel so special. After that I instructed him to get the rope from our toy bin and I proceeded to tie him up in a kneeling hog tie rope thing. I’m by no means perfect with my rope skills but I did the best I could and he was bound pretty securely.

While kneeling there, bound, I stroked his cock and teased and edged him. Over and over stroking as he whimpered. Pinching his nipples asking him if he was my good boy? Asking if he was my slutty boy? Asking if he was so horny he would humiliate himself by humping my hand? I made him kneel there and tell me “yes, ma’am, I’m your horny slutty good boy” while he rocked back and forth humping my hand. Hehe it turns me on right now thinking about it.

I took control, once again, of what kind of stroking his cock was going to get. I edged him a couple more times and well, had myself going so much that I accidentally edged him one stroke too much and out dribbled a little cum. It wasn’t a full on ruined orgasm, there really was no twitching or anything, but it was enough that a few drips slowly fell to the floor below.

Of course we couldn’t have an un-punished ruined orgasm so I made him hobble his way over on his knees to the side of the couch, he laid across it and I used my paddle to spank a nice red into his ass cheeks. Since his hands were so nicely tied behind his back, I straddled his back and used his fingers on my wet pussy while spanking him. I was so fucking turned on by the noises he was making I came good and hard on his hands and back and squirted a little puddle onto him as well. It was quite a hot moment. I love the sounds he makes when I spank him, it just soaks my pussy!

So that was the way our morning started the other day. We had a few things to go and do during the day so we did pick up again later in the afternoon… You’ll have to wait to hear about that from Cagedmonkey. 🙂

We had our Mistress/slave couple friends over for the weekend and enjoyed a very nice time together. It’s always fun seeing them, no matter what goes on, whether we are out doing family things or having a night of drinking and kinky sex.

The weekend was overall nice and relaxing and not too entirely hardcore – for those that were hoping they’d come here and hear all kinds of stories about the hardcore, bondage, D/s, crazy sex happenings – sorry. It was pretty laid back for the most part but there certainly was some drinking going on and some fun kinky sex times!
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I had decided that cagedmonkey was going to stay locked most of the weekend. He spent most of the weekend rooty as hell in his cage. Boy, did he ever beg and beg to get out. He desperately wanted to be touched and teased and tortured. The only answer he got all weekend was, “No, baby.” He spent the nights on the weekend being forced to watch everyone else cumming, forced to feel the jealousy of wanting his own orgasm. At one point I used the wand on his cage while we sat there next to our friends on the bed. They were on his side of the bed that night. I forced him to watch her get fucked and get pleased by her slave orally. Each time he tried to close his eyes and moan I told him to keep looking. To keep watching him slide his free cock into her warm wet pussy. To watch and listen to his tongue and all the wetness you could hear as her slaves pushed her closer and closer to orgasm. Our Mistress friend had fun verbally driving him mad as well as her own slave, reminding him of his situation. How his big thick manly cock was all locked up in a cage and controlled by me. I made him watch and listen, while his cock was vibrating and straining against the steel, as she got to orgasm and leaked her juices all over the bed.

And then I made him sleep, aching and painfully horny, in another woman’s wet spot.

We did get a few moments alone while our friends took the kids out, one night, and I decided to make cagedmonkey’s frustration run just a little deeper. I was so wet and horny I climbed up on his lap, pinned his hands above his head and straddled his caged cock. I rubbed my pussy all over him and came nice and good on his cock, covering his cage in my gooey juices.
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You can see all the thick gooey girl cum in the bars of his cage. There was so much, it was a beautiful thing!
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While I would love to get much more descriptive about some of the other happenings of the weekend, it proves a little difficult when having to leave out names and trying to keep anonymity safe. We will have to leave those details for other, more private, areas of the blogosphere! You know how to contact us! 🙂