Conversations

When cagedmonkey and I really got into this whole lifestyle and living it everyday, we didn’t have anyone else to really talk to about it, especially not in real life! We had met some good people on Chastity Forums and started reading, commenting and even communicating with some other bloggers. It was so nice to be able to talk about all this stuff with other people. However, hiding behind our blog and them behind theirs or a computer screen left us feeling only half fulfilled. We really wanted to find real life friends to talk to about all this stuff and more. I mean how many friends can you say know the real you, the whole you? Probably not too many! Are you “good friends” with people who don’t even know your real name, out of fear they could out you to other friends or family?

Well in our latest podcast we wanted to talk about how we stepped out of our comfort zone and got out from hiding behind the computer to find some real flesh and blood people to talk to and become friends with. We talk about how it felt going to our first munch and meeting new friends in other situations.

Hope you enjoy listening! As always you can listen here:

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I did want to make sure I mentioned a few ways to find local get togethers in your area. Of course you could join FetLife  and look for events that are posted there, local groups and search for friends. It’s been a really great resource for us but do please be aware that it is a sort of social media platform and sometimes you will find some not so good people floating around!

Another place I recently found but don’t know too much about (I tried to get an interview with the owner) is FindaMunch it seems like a very nice site with lots of locations. I’d assume, if you host a regular local munch you could get yours listed on that site too!

***Bonus: We have a new lovely voice on our podcast – not only do we get our music from bensounds.com we now have a wonderful sexy friend who has recorded our intro audio! Thank you Mistress “Blue Rose.”

Monkey in a Cage is back with another episode of the podcast! I know it’s been a little bit since we’ve gotten one up but here it is. If you follow us or subscribe to our podcast on Soundcloud.com you already got the notification that we posted a new podcast. Go you!!

Cagedmonkey and I were quite inspired by Drunk History, so in this episode we decided it might be fun to answer some questions from our readers and followers on a podcast while intoxicated. We were asked some questions about pegging, how it feels teasing and communication. Thank you again to our followers who asked questions on Twitter before and during our recording. We didn’t do a whole lot of editing to this so you get to hear all of the drunken slurs and tangents we get off on. We hope you enjoy!! 🙂

Click here to listen to our podcast on Soundcloud.com.

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I know you have all been patiently waiting for our next Podcast installment – that sounds weird! lol Anyway, here it is!!! Episode 2 is now available for your listening pleasure! I really think you will enjoy it as much as we loved answering your questions! Thanks so much to everyone for the great feedback from our last podcast and for the wonderful questions to answer!

We would LOVE to hear from you again but for now, I’ll shut up and let you listen! You can click to download or listen now!

Hello guys and happy August!!! Can you believe we are more than half way through the year?? Cagemonkey has been denied for 7 MONTHS!!! That’s NUTS!!! We are completely NUTS!!! hahaha

So ANYway, CM and I have been throwing around some ideas on how to bring more excitement to monkeyinacage.com. One of those ideas was to start doing a podcast. We hope it will help all of you get to know us better and help US to explain this whole world we live in, better for you. We have enjoyed sharing our journey with all of you for these past few years and we hope to continue sharing with you as we continue exploring!

Bear with us as we try this out and learn to get things posted to the blog! I think I’ve worked out getting it embedded and I will add a link to hopefully allow for downloading our podcasts – in hopes of making them a bit more portable for those who like to listen on their terms!

Without further ado here is our little podcast! (btw someone test it out and please tell me if you can download from that link!)

CM: So… wow! Meeting Mistress Marie and David was sooooo much fun! I’ll admit, I was very nervous beforehand. I’ve never actually met anyone in this lifestyle before, so I had no idea what was going to happen. What were your feelings leading up to the big meetup?

Lady M: I was so super excited to meet them. I wouldn’t say I was nervous because you know me, I’m a talkative, outgoing type person. Especially, since we found out that Marie and I have so much in common in our vanilla life and our kinky life. We’ve talked to lots of kinky people and made some great friends and I was excited to bring that into real life.

CM: You’re not kidding about having so much in common. It really seemed as if you were talking to yourself at times! Even when we started talking about some vanilla stuff (a.k.a. stuff that usually doesn’t make it onto the blog), it was amazing at how similar we were as couples. I think that’s why it was so easy for me to warm up to them.

Lady M: It was super easy to talk to them. I loved how we would just flow from one topic to the next and from vanilla topics right to kinky ones and not even flinch. It wasn’t one bit awkward going from talking about pulled pork to your dick in its cage. I especially liked how easy it was to be like “of course he’s locked up right now, honey, pulled your pants down and show them your locked up cock!” Hehe.

CM: Yes, you pulling my caged cock out of my pants was definitely an ice breaker. 🙂 You seemed very “interested” in the various toys that Mistress Marie brought along. Were you at all disappointed that you didn’t get to try any of them out that night?

Lady M: I really loved the different implements she had for spanking, I’ve been looking to build up our options, especially since I broke my paddle. What actually surprised (or maybe not?) me a bit was how many of the same toys we have! I did love being able to show off the few things wee brought, like Adam and the Thruster. I know Marie was dying for a good probe to use on David. I think it would have been neat to bend you over that big table and beat your ass with one of those. How do you think you would have handled having your pants to your ankles and whimpering in front of other people?

CM: If you wanted me to, would I have had a choice? 🙂

Lady M: Of course not. 🙂

CM: I figured you’d say that. 🙂 Honestly, I think I would have been perfectly fine with it. They were so cool and the vibe was so perfect between the four of us, I think it would have been completely natural. I was actually a little disappointed that I didn’t get a chance to show off how well I lick your pussy and make you cum.

Lady M: That will just have to wait until the next time we meet. 😉 I had a great time with Marie and David, and I can’t wait until we do it again!

Yesterday I started to feel a bit depressed and I couldn’t exactly put a finger on the specific thing that was making me feel down. I do know that it hit me quick and hit me kinda hard. One of the crappy things about being so in tune with my mental state (I’ve got way too many years of therapy to thank for that) is that I FEEL my depression kick in almost immediately. I feel my body change and my thoughts change. Yes, it’s an AWESOME thing that I can now do that because I can get right on top of it and work out the problem before I spiral out of control down into a deep hole. So, I knew something was wrong after cagedmonkey came home and asked “do you think I could get out and maybe sleep more comfortably?” For some reason that really got to me.

When I got up yesterday morning and was texting with CM on his way home from work, I was excited about maybe putting him in the bondage sack and depriving him good sleep and just tormenting him all day. It was exciting to think about all the things I wanted to do to tease him and drive him crazy. After all, I had spent the night before sending him pics and video of me getting off with my wand. It really seemed to drive him nuts.
wand
After he got home and asked me to get out in such a non-urgent way it just gave me this feeling that he wasn’t even horny. I felt like he wasn’t aching to get out and that all the teasing and stuff I’d been doing wasn’t frustrating him at all. I LOVE to see his frustration, to hear him beg, to know that what I’m doing is making him bonkers. I mentioned to him that I thought he should unlock and masturbate because he didnt seem all that submissive to me. I felt like maybe he was just bored and done playing my game. This apparently confused him because in his mind he was feeling very submissive – I just wasnt seeing it outwardly. This is where the wonderful communication in a relationship comes in.

Our conversation was through text messages because of the kids, it went like this:

CM: I’m sorry you feel as though my desire to be dominated is gone…. I don’t know what is causing these thoughts, but it’s not true…. I love being controlled by you, being kept by you, being yours and only yours all day every day…. Is it possible that you are questioning your own level of passion for this? Could it be that you are projecting – instead of me not being as submissive as you like, in fact you are not being as dominant as you want to be? Not trying to blame you, I promise, just trying to figure out what the deal is.

LM: I don’t feel like I have any loss of passion… At the moment I don’t feel submission and maybe it is my fault maybe I’m not being dominant enough, maybe I’m not intense enough… I’m just feeling inadequate.

CM: I don’t feel that’s true. I’m enjoying everything about us.
Would you like me to stop “asking out”? Is that me taking too much power from you?

LM: I don’t know what I want… I want to feel like you NEED desperately to be out and that’s why your asking and not feel like it’s a “hey yeah, I was thinking I could sleep comfortably” thing… Maybe what I need is to keep you locked up a little extended and tease you to tears. Maybe it was just that whole situation made it feel weird… Maybe I need to hear some me and you fantasies too. Not stockade, fucking machine, girlie play partner, abandonment fantasies but you and me fantasies from you. To feel like there is still this dynamic in your mind between us and that all that other stuff isn’t necessary. I dunno, I guess sometimes I feel like I’m competing with the bigger fantasies and maybe I won’t live up to those.

CM: I don’t “fantasize” about us too much because it’s already real and I love it! Maybe I’ve gotten too much into the “don’t expect anything” mentality, but I haven’t shared too much only because I don’t want to push you or affect you, etc… I was really hoping you’d follow through with your “sleep sack” idea today. It’s been a while since you’ve done any full bondage/teasing type stuff…. I didn’t want to push too hard and mention it/ask for it because that’s not what I do anymore. We’ve had a lot of “starter” moments lately – like the other day when you were stimulating pegging me on the bed, etc – but not a lot of times where we’ve actually played together. I figured you were getting back into it on your own pace, so I didn’t want to pressure you.

LM: I guess I at least want to know that you think about and desire things between us… it’s not about asking because I like that you don’t ask or push me or annoy me to do things… but telling me “oh I was thinking, last night, about that time when you tied me to the bed….” or “I dreamed about us laying together and I realized you had tied me down and you were masturbating next to me and I couldn’t move to help or touch you or even look at you” etc. Knowing that you think about me sexually, that you remember those times makes me want to recreate them or do something similar… it let’s me know that I did something good and you liked it and you want it again. It’s not you asking when you are reminiscing – even if you wrote about it on the blog – how “that one time” felt, how you loved it, what you loved, that you’d love it again… stuff like that. Being “caught up” in something we did – not obsessing but the “wow, ugh, awesomeness, frustration” and reminiscing – that’s a good word to describe it… not getting stuck in a moment or on something we did but being caught up in it just enough to show me “fuck that was awesome can we do it again?”

CM: I will try harder to find that “middle ground.”

LM: Btw we’ve had those moments but then the playtime is lost and, today… I just felt blah after this morning and my oomph for the sleep sack drifted quickly and I had this why bother feeling… like it wouldn’t matter if I did because I’m not good enough anyway.

CM: I’m sorry I haven’t been giving you what you need.

LM: I don’t think it’s that YOU haven’t been giving me what I need… I just think I’m figuring it out, right now, talking to you… that sometimes (obviously not all the time!) I need to know what I’m doing is good and appreciated and wanted and desired. Maybe I’m completely wrong and I just suck.

CM: You don’t suck, I wish you sucked more, tbh 😉
On my penis
My achy needy penis

Ok, ok you can see where that conversation led after that. Having that conversation actually catapulted us into an extremely frustratingly horny day. I was sopping wet all day while we were sexting and sneaking playful moments here and there when the kids were busy. It was wonderful to talk about all the naughty, playful, kinky things we do again. I’ve missed hearing how tight his cage feels or how what I’m doing is effecting him. I think we got to a point where it just felt so normal to horny all the time and he must have figured I knew he was horny, so why tell me. Well… telling me fuels me, keeps me going and makes me eager to push the intensity level. I really am just figuring this out and I’m so happy that my marriage is in a different place now. Two years ago, we’d never mention sex, let alone have a conversation about anything that was bothering one of us. We would hold on to it and let it build resentment – it was how we coped with the fear. This is SO much better and I love being in this place with my husband. I love him and where we are emotionally, spiritually and sexually.

This morning cagedmonkey and I had a conversation. He was telling me just how horny he was, which I love! I decided it was a good time to keep him abreast (haha I said breast!) of how the next couple months of his denial are going to go. He’s already at around 7 weeks I think (really, I stopped counting such things!). I figured screenshots of it were so much easier than trying to type it all out. So this is how things went – yes, with my stupid phone typos and all!
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Haha he’s says a major problem with his horny… He’s so damn cute. 🙂
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Yup, that’s a good subby boy, thank me for denying your orgasm. 🙂 of course I didn’t decide that this morning. I worked it all out with myself yesterday and decided last night. Neither of us was feeling well though and he called into work & went to bed at 6pm and I went at 9pm. Oh well, as a few of you, who talk to me off the blog, know I was having a bad day physically yesterday and needed the rest.
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Yeah, I guess I’m in one of those let me see how bad he can get moods. Plus, I absolutely get off on him begging. If he gets pissy, I swear, I’ll be bending his ass over and spanking it as red as a baboons.
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Haha yeah, yeah, go ahead and laugh at my typo. It’s funny! Just for your info puss=plus. This is completely true though. I feel like pushing him, in the mean time that pushes me and I seriously do not want to get burnt out trying to do too much at once. It’s not an easy job being a wife, mother and keyholder. Being a keyholder certainly does not mean Lock it and Leave it. Maybe there are some out there that do that but it is not fair to anyone trying to enjoy this.
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Yeah, baby, you don’t have a choice but I do like to know you’re feelings. Maybe he’ll come here and post how he feels. 🙂 It’s going to be a fantastic two months ahead leading into our ceremony.

Speaking of our upcoming ceremony, we did just have someone ask recently if our ceremony is vanilla or were we adding in a “collaring.” The simple answer to that is yes, it will be a purely vanilla ceremony with some of our family and the members of our church. I suppose this could be a whole blog post on its own so I’ll leave this post to what it actually is.

cagedmonkey: Your good boy is going to see if he can get back to sleep…. If not,  gonna eat and get dressed, might tiny nap

Lady M: Ok darling boy

cm: Biiiiiiig smile 🙂

Lady M: I love knowing I can leave you with yourself and the instructions and you won’t take advantage of my trust

cm: I’m glad that you can trust me in situations like  this, that bondage isnt necessary…. Instead it’s a tool for you to use when you want to tease and/or frustrate me

Lady M: oh how I love to tease and frustrate you my sweet boy

cm: I always thought it  would be so  hot  to  be so desperate  to cum that I couldnt be trusted in a  situation like this….. Now I realize that I wont ever get that bad off, but that’s a good thing. Being this devoted and  committed  to you is better 😉 Wanting you to have control and not wanting to let you  down  by taking it from u  is better  🙂

Lady M: You’re an amazing subby hubby and I love that you want to submit to my desires… even your orgasms.

(The following is an excerpt from a text message conversation between Lady M and cagedmonkey the morning after an intense teasing session, which included multiple edges and a ruined orgasm inside the Jailbird!)

Lady M: Sleeping good, my love?

cagedmonkey: Yeah, pretty good… except for the fact that I want to hump the mattress, or you, or something… I’m fucking horny!!!

Lady: Oh, God that’s hot! I’d love for you to hump me!

cm: It’s actually beyond horny… my need for sex is almost painful, it’s so bad. And is it possible that my balls are even more swollen than they’ve been lately?

Lady: Maybe. I was rubbing them really good. I wanna feel them right now…

cm: I’m not even sure “horny” is the right word for it, anyway. “Horny” would indicate that I’m turned on or whatever. I sorta am, but that’s beside the point. Right now, I just need to fuck.

Lady: Hehe. 🙂

cm: I just filled up the cage in like three seconds… I’m twitching and throbbing now for no reason other than I’m talking to you.

Lady: Omfg, that turns me on so much!

cm: It’s so fucking intense right now. I was DYING before! I wanted to cum so badly, for real! I didn’t want you to deny me any more, I just wanted to cum and I didn’t care how.

Lady: I loved every second of it.

cm: It was so hard to get myself to “cum” and it totally wasn’t worth it… fucking sucked that you ruined my o while I was still in the cage. So fucking frustrating, I nearly wanted to cry.

Lady: Awwww, my poor sweet boy.

cm: I can’t imagine making it another 6 months. I don’t even want to wait another day to get out of this cage!

Lady: I wish I could help you with that. 😉

cm: Which part? lol

Lady: Any of it. 🙂 Hehe

cm: Yeah, but you’re cumming as much as you want, you can fuck my cock when you want apparently, and you can get a big thick (albeit fake) cock in your pussy… all without unlocking me! So I don’t think your desire to help me is as pressing as my need to get out of this fucking cage and empty my balls with a good hard cum is. 🙂

Lady: Yeah, I guess you’re right. 🙂 Speaking of cumming as much as I want, I’ll be upstairs as soon as lunch is done. You better be ready for me to grind my pussy on your face until I cum nice and hard…

cm: Yes, ma’am.

cagedmonkey: So…….. can I cum yet? 🙂

Lady: Uhhh, no love, it’s just not time for that. Especially when you’re at work.

cm: Of course. Why do I even ask? lol

Lady: Hoping one time I’ll actually say yes? 😉

cm: I guess so, although I have a hard time believing you will say yes. There have been times recently where you were so horny I thought you might cave in, but you didn’t. If you didn’t give in during those times, I doubt you’ll ever give in to me early.

Lady You’re right, I’ve become much stronger than in the beginning. At first I was still in the “need to please him” phase even if I didn’t think I was. Deep down I didn’t want to frustrate you, upset you, etc. It just caused me to be weak to your pleas.

cm: Now it seems like it’s the exact opposite – the more I beg and plead, the more you enjoy it and the harder you push me!

Lady It must be bittersweet that I’ve become so strong, huh?

cm: Honestly, I couldn’t be happier. I know that I can be honest with you about how I feel (sooooo frustrated!!!) and what I want (to cum sooooo bad!!!!), and not worry about influencing you or topping from the bottom. You truly are in full control, and I’m very lucky to serve a dominant with such a strong sense of what she wants.

Lady You are a lucky boy! Hehe 🙂 It wasn’t hard after awhile to embrace the frustration and let it entertain me. Once I was able to almost laugh at your situation, I began to really get enjoyment out of your frustration. I started enjoying the control of making you so incredibly horny for me. I just love getting you to that point where you HAVE to touch me just to feel my skin… because you’re THAT horny.

cm: And I definitely am that horny! Speaking of which…… can I cum now?

Lady No :)~

cm: Damn…..