Chastity Device

St writes:

I read a 3 year old post “The Ring’s the Thing”… and you mentioned that you switched back to the regular ring, because the anatomical one started to feel uncomfortable. I would love to read an update regarding this matter, please. I’m thinking of buying the Revenge, but i can’t decide which ring to choose.

Click here for the post that St is referring to.

It kinda surprised me when I found the anatomical ring to be less comfortable than the standard round one for the Revenge. I had heard good things about the anatomical ring from others, and also it’s designed specifically for comfort. So you’d think it would be the best choice, but it wasn’t for me.

But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t the best choice for everyone.

Stay with me…

Just like I wrote in this post about trying out the double ring, the comfort of the base ring is really up to the wearer. Some guys will find the anatomical ring to be a better fit than the standard one; some guys may feel better in an oval ring, while others stick with the round design. You really need to try it to see if it works for you. Just make sure you don’t end up forcing it just because someone else says it’s “the best.”

On the other hand, I do recommend getting the integrated lock option that is available on all of the Steelworxx designs!

For those who follow us on Twitter, you may have seen ML’s excitement over the arrival of the Revenge’s new lockset in the mail. Her excitement is pretty well justified – it’s been almost two years since I’ve worn the closed-style chastity cage. Although it doesn’t really matter how My Lady keeps me in chastity, it is always nice to have options. Also, it really is a beautiful device, very sexy and stylish.

ML didn’t waste time with getting my cock back in the Revenge – I’ll be wearing it for most (if not all) of the weekend. ML thought it would be best to have me wear it at home, just in case I needed to get used to it again. It’s not much of a different feeling compared to the Jailbird – both are stainless steel cages locked around my cock and balls, after all – but it is a different device than I’m used to wearing lately. Better to get acclimated while I’m at home than at work.

I said it’s not much different, but it is a different feeling: while my cock tends to bulge around the bars of the Jailbird when I get hard in the cage, the Revenge compresses me all around and gives no ground. It’s just a little bit more claustrophobic, a little bit more compete constriction.

I asked ML today if she feels any different about having me in the Revenge as opposed to the Jailbird, whether she likes me bulging out of the cage or being squeezed by the steel. She said that it is different: the Jailbird is more of a tease, letting me feel what I can’t have; the Revenge is about frustration, isolating me from what I truly need. She did say that she doesn’t really prefer one over the other, thoughl both give her control over my cock, just in different ways.

This weekend should be a very frustrating reintroduction to the Revenge. ML is excited to see and hear what it feels like when I get one of my strong “rooty” erections in the Revenge, and she is also interested in exploring her new love of caged sex with the smooth steel inside her pussy.

I get asked this a lot: what does it feel like to wear a chastity device? Does it always feel weird? Does it ever get comfortable? How is it possible to live a normal life when your cock and balls are locked into a steel cage?

Well, it’s sort of like any other new thing: it takes some getting used to, but it becomes normal after a while. It’s almost like a piece of jewelry that you need to get used to wearing… except that it’s padlocked to your junk.

I remember when ML and I first got married, I was very much aware of my wedding ring when I was wearing it. I’d play with it, fiddle with it, and I could feel it between my fingers. I wasn’t used to it, so it felt really weird. But now, after more than 13 years of marriage, wearing it is more normal to me than not wearing it is.

Obviously, I haven’t been wearing the chastity cage for 13 years (although, sometimes, it seems like it’s that long between erections!). But I have been wearing it for a decent amount of time – it’s getting close to 4 years of being in chastity, going to work wearing my device, sleeping with it on, etc. It’s part of my normal routine now.

In fact, it feels different now when I’m not wearing it rather than when I am. Now, I’m surprised when I reach down to adjust myself and I don’t feel the hard steel of the Jailbird. I’m reflexively careful when I wrestle or snuggle with the kids, automatically trying to avoid an awkward explanation. Sometimes I even surprise myself when I go to use the bathroom and I find myself uncaged, completely forgetting that My Lady had unlocked me earlier that day. I’m just so used to being in chastity for ML, I hardly ever give it a second thought.

That’s not to say that wearing the chastity cage is always as comfortable as can be. There are times when I get so hard and full in the cage that it’s almost painful. Sometimes I get woken up in the middle of the night by my cock fighting a losing battle against the steel bars locked around it, and the only way I can get back to sleep is by reading or playing games on my phone until my cock calms down.


See how badly I’m bulging against the bars in that pic… doesn’t look all that comfortable, does it? Honestly, it’s not… but it really is worth it. It’s worth the time getting used to it in order to wear the cage for My Lady, to be able to be locked and kept for her. It doesn’t start out natural, but it becomes natural.

Ugh… NO!!!

I recently got, yet another, email about locking up a guy. I get them pretty often but just about every time I get one, I need to respond with something along the lines of you can’t just lock up a guys cock and throw away the key. I do want to mention, I know there could be a guy or two out there that does actually want to be locked up, have the key thrown away and their dick completely unused and forgotten about. As a matter of fact, I have such a boy, who’s key I hold, that enjoys the fact that there is nothing he can do or say to get his key back or get his cock unlocked… ever. There is really no use for his puny little cock. That is something that is few and far between and even in his circumstance, I STILL keep him mentally teased and reminded of his predicament every so often.

Male chastity with a spouse or partner, however, is usually not about not having sex or not having to “deal” with your guy once he’s locked up. If anything, it might be more work when you’ve got someone under lock and key. I’ve written about this plenty of times and I’ve even done a podcast on it. When you get a guy to give up control of his most intimate parts, he’s also giving you an incredible amount of trust. He’s trusting that you won’t lock up his dick and forget about it. He needs to know that you enjoy having him locked up as much as he enjoys being locked up for you. He may have a constant physical reminder of who owns his cock but there definitely needs to be some consistent mental reminders. Especially those amazing mindfucks that cause him to press and struggle against the cage, aching to be released. 

I really can’t stress enough about how important it is to give attention to the one you control. Your words, alone, can have a huge impact on how their time in chastity will be. When I say you need to give attention, I’m not necessarily talking about constant physical attention. I do think there needs to be some of that as well but, more than that, the mental side of things will certainly keep your guy from getting lonely. One of the most important things to remember, when locking up a guy, is that it’s going to be work. You do not want them getting lonely and feeling sexually forgotten about. I’m pretty sure I even have a blog post here with lots of ideas of how to keep your guy mentally mindfucked and well teased while locked up. Look around a bit.

Last night, My Lady finally unlocked me after 30 days of 24/7 chastity. She also allowed me inside her pussy. She also allowed me to cum inside her.

What a relief!

I was a little bit nervous that, after a month of no erections, that it would be a little painful – in the past, I’ve been able to feel the skin on my cock stretching after such a long time without getting hard. It was only temporary, but it wasn’t very pleasant. But, thankfully, there was none of that this time around. The only problem was the issue of hairiness – I wasn’t able to shave everywhere with the cage on, so I have about a month of overgrowth down there. I didn’t get a chance to take care of it, because I was back in the cage this morning before leaving for work.

So, who knows… I may end up with another month of growth down there before I get a chance to shave… or more?

Assuming that My Lady doesn’t get the urge to unlock me later tonight (and there’s no reason to think that she will), tomorrow will make it 3 full weeks into 2017… three full weeks that I have been locked in the Jailbird, day and night. Three full weeks of my cock throbbing and struggling inside the bars of my chastity cage. Three full weeks of troubled sleep thanks to unattainable nighttime erections.

Three full weeks of nothing anywhere near this.

Three full weeks of realizing that I look pretty damn sexy with my cock locked in chastity.

The “longest lockup” benchmark for me is quickly approaching, and this time around it seems as though ML is perfectly content to let it continue. I, of course, am getting really desperate… but there is a not-so-small part of me that actually enjoys the idea of being driven even further insane by my need for a simple erection. In fact, I can’t deny or ignore the fact that my cock slowly fills my cage whenever I think about it.

Now, there is NO way I’d be able to handle being locked up over a span of multiple months. I really do need the freedom of getting hard and fucking ML (at least occasionally), and I know ML feels the same. I was actually surprised this time around that we’ve gone so long – two days ago was the first time ML and I didn’t have penetrative sex on our anniversary. As horrible as that sounds, though, it didn’t feel out of the ordinary at all.

This is who we are now. This is our love; this is our marriage – my wife keeps my cock locked in a steel chastity cage for as long as she wants, uses my cock for her pleasure, and teases and denies me orgasms until she wants me to experience that pleasure. It’s amazing, and it couldn’t be any more perfect for either of us. I need this, and My Lady needs it just as much. 

That doesn’t make waiting weeks for a full erection any easier, though.

With a new year comes new year’s resolutions… although I really don’t believe in the concept. Why do you have to wait until the next year to make a change in your life? Why not start now? What good is waiting for an arbitrary date to pass to start improving yourself?

What was I talking about?

Ok, so anyways…

Independent of New Years, I have decided to eat a little better and try to get myself in shape. After all, I am getting older; if there is a time to get in shape, it’s now. ML is helping me with a meal plan and an exercise routine, as well. There is one part of me, however, that has gotten out of shape and diet or gym workout will help me with.

Simply put, my cum muscles have gotten weak.

Contrary to how it may seem, ML likes to see me cum – you’d think that a woman who keeps her husband in chastity and controls his orgasms wouldn’t be all that concerned with it, but she really does like it. She likes to pump it out of me, knowing that she got me so horny and so turned on for it to happen. I, of course, like it as well – because it happens so infrequently, the sight of my cock squirting cum all over ML’s boobs/ass/wherever she allows me to is a beautiful thing.

Unfortunately, since we have begun our chastity and orgasm denial lifestyle, the force of my orgasms have gradually declined. What was once a forceful spurt has slowly weakened over time to just a tiny dribble. My orgasms themselves are still intense; sometimes as intense as ever, depending on the teasing and/or lead-up to it. It’s just the physical reaction that has subsided.

At first, I was worried that it was a volume problem, but I don’t think that’s the case. Drinking lots and lots of water does help, but I’ve found that there isn’t an actual decrease in volume; after my orgasm, there is plenty of cum that drips out of my cock (or that ML squeezes out with her talented fingers). The cum is there, I’m just not strong enough to shoot it out.

Although I could go ahead and use the “well, my cock is so damn huge that it’s too far for the cum to travel” excuse, I’d rather be realistic and see the problem for what it is: my cum muscles have weakened with orgasm denial. To be honest, this isn’t all that surprising; you may remember recently that I went over 3/4 of a year without using those muscles. Imagine if you sat in a wheelchair for 9 months, then you tried to go out and run the 100 meter dash… that’s kind of the situation I’m up against.

So, the solution is strength reconditoning. There are no cum muscle rehab programs that I am aware of, and as much as I would like ML to put me on an “orgasm exercise regimen,” I would seriously miss the teasing and orgasm denial. What I need is a plan that works for us. Here’s what I’ve come up with:
1) PC muscle exercises when locked (or unlocked). For the unsciencey readers out there, the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles are the muscles that make you ejaculate (sort of… please don’t flood the comments section with Wikipedia proving I’m wrong, I’m going for simplicity here). You squeeze these muscles when you act as if you are trying to stop yourself from peeing (again, simplicity). These are the muscles that have gotten weak for me. I have been doing these exercises, but not regularly enough to make an impact.

2) More frequent edging and/or ruined orgasms when unlocked. I can’t believe I’m actually asking for this, but it’s true: although PC muscles are a good exercise, the most effective one would probably be frequent regular orgasms. That’s most likely not happening any time soon, so I’m guessing the next best thing would be more edges or ruined orgasms. The muscles aren’t utilized as they would be in a full-on cum, but it’s better than nothing.

I really would like to improve this situation. It would be pretty interesting for ML to tease me during long denial periods with videos of my own cock shooting cum all over her gorgeous titties. I have a lot of work to do to get there, but it’s an excellent goal to visualize. 🙂

My wife attacked me last night. Seriously… there’s no better way to describe it.

My Lady’s pent up horny reached a boiling point last night; she had endured her doctor-mandated orgasm denial for long enough, and she was going to get what she wanted from me.

I should have seen it coming the night before: ML took advantage of me being unlocked and had me fuck her nice and hard, both from behind and standing against the wall. She wanted it so badly, she didn’t want to have to be careful – she allowed me to cum in her pussy if I promised not to stop until she was done. Nowadays, with my chance of having an orgasm on any given day is a complete mystery, I’m not turning that deal down. It felt so good to just let loose on her, I almost ended up cumming twice before she was finished.

But she wasn’t finished. All she did was prime her need.

Last night, we were just about ready to go to sleep – TV off, covers up, ready for bed. Then, it all started with an innocent snuggle. My Lady moaned as my naked butt rubbed against her, and her hands were quickly feeling my body up and down. She squeezed me tighter against her, and I could feel her hunger rising quickly. A moment later, ML was pulling the covers off of me, rolling me onto my back, and straddling my hips.

Was the fact that my cock was locked in steel going to stop her from getting what she needed? Hell no! Her soaking wet pussy slid down onto my caged cock, taking me inside her with absolutely no difficulty. Apparently, over time ML has gotten used to fucking me with my cage on; she rode me almost as if I wasn’t wearing it. She pushed herself down onto me, taking my cage in just about as deep as possible, with her clit rubbing against the post of the base ring.

Fucking ML with the cage on has got to be the absolute worst torture ever. My cock struggles and pushes against the cage, eager to feel ML’s warm wet pussy wrapped around it. But I can only feel it where the skin is exposed. The incomplete sensation actually makes my cock try to get even harder, as an attempt to find that missing pleasure. Meanwhile, the steel doesn’t yield at all, and I am left with an incredibly full and painful cage that feels like it might rip my balls off my body.

Add to this the maddening sensation of feeling like I might just cum at any minute, and it makes the suffering that much more unbearable. When my cock fills the cage to capacity (and more), it starts to bulge out between the bars of the cage. Sometimes, just by horrible chance, one of the most sensitive parts of my cock is helplessly exposed:

All of the sensation of ML’s pussy feels like it’s concentrated on that one spot. It’s so intense that it often feels like I am as close as I can be to orgasm without cumming – only to find out that, as ML keeps riding me, I can inch even closer as the moments go by. It’s like having an edge dragged out constantly over the course of minutes, often as ML is enjoying orgasm after orgasm on my poor aching cock.

Add to that the fact that I can never decide if I actually WANT to cum at this point or not…

I’ve found out in the past that I can have an orgasm while caged; I’ve also found out how excruciating it is to have an orgasm while caged. All of this is running through my head while I’m nearly dying from caged edging torture, and I start to think just how bad an orgasm can be at this point… is it as bad as I remember? Is it as bad as this? Does it really even matter? How much sexual torture can I stand?

All of this, while ML is soaking my cock (and the bedsheets below me) with her pussy juices.

So yeah, I was whimpering and moaning, wanting the torture to end but not wanting it to end, wanting to cum but not wanting to cum… all of this turns My Lady on even more (the whimpering, especially). More shuddering orgasms, more of her pussy squeezing and gripping my cock, more pussy juices soaking my balls…

It’s a miracle that we even got to sleep last night.

Speaking of, My Lady wouldn’t let me go to sleep until she took care of one last thing – she took her dripping wet pussy and rubbed it all over my body and face, covering me with her juices. I could feel it all over me – on my chest, on my chin… I could feel and smell it everywhere. I breathed in her delicious scent as I laid down and tried to get to sleep.

Did I say it was a mircale that I was able to fall asleep last night?

I realized today means quite a bit to me. November 21, 2013 has such a depth for me and I realized it when I was looking back at those silly memory things on Facebook. It means more than the day cagedmonkey handed me the keys to his chastity cage and asked that I take control of the most intimate parts of himself. That day, in itself, was such a beautiful moment, him kneeling in front of me and telling me that nothing would make him happier than for me to accept the keys and take full control. I do wish I could remember those exact words but the moment sticks in my mind anyway. 

However, wearing a chastity device, a removable device, is one thing but agreeing to be permanently marked, showing your devotion and submission and your love is something completely deeper. Today, three years ago, I took cagedmonkey to get his Chastity tattoo and I absolutely love that he has given himself completely to me. I am his and he is mine, we belong to each other and with each other. I can feel it every time I touch his skin. Almost 17 years later and it still feels electric. It’s comforting feeling his arms around me. 

Thank you, my darling subby hubby, for being mine and not being afraid to make it permanent and forever. I will forever wear your key as you wear my lock!

I had the pleasure recently to chat with the owners at lockeduplove.net and learned a bit about their site and how they got started in the chastity business. In 2007, LUL began selling their products via eBay. In 2008, they developed the LUL website and continued selling the CB products and providing customers with advice by telephone and/or email. Though small and family-run, their business has continued to grow every year since then. Through the years, other companies have approached them to request they sell their products and accessories in the male chastity arena on their site, and many of these products they still carry, how cool is that? They have even developed some proprietary products, such as the Guardian for CB models and for the Holy Trainer® that they also provide to some retailers outside of the USA.  They certainly seem to be the largest retailer of Holy Trainer® and Birdlocked products in the USA.They also carry a lot of chastity accessories making locking up your love an easy process! 

I know many people in this lifestyle that have used their services and continue to. Locked up Love prides themselves on customer service, and always go the extra mile to please people (like adding a note to some packages when it is a gift). This has led to a strong reputation from those knowledgeable in this lifestyle, and they get many referrals and repeat customers as a result. If you are looking for a place to start with chastity and you are not looking to go custom just yet, check them out!